I've had plenty of time to think about things and appreciate the small moments, like sunrise while running the dogs at the high school.
Workouts done on the coast over a holiday weekend end with a little beach time.
|The sun came out eventually, really|
The bonus feature of a Northern California beach is, it doubles as an ice bath!
In any event, maybe taper or hormones or 10 hours of sleep a night makes me introspective but, in the course of driving ~250 miles today (drive dog to dog show, drive back, drive to packet pickup, drive back), I had a lot of time to think. About the life I had 10 years ago and how much it has changed. I originally wrote a lot of this out in detail but decided to pass on posting it...I suppose I should respect the privacy of the party in question.
The point is, triathlon for me has really been a way to define my life on my own terms, instead of how others chose to define it for me in the past. I'm ever grateful for my husband, who from the day we got together has always encouraged me to do whatever makes me happy, without judgement, and not allowed me to fall into the easy trap of letting someone else make decisions for me. I don't think there's been a crazy hare-brained Molly scheme yet that he hasn't supported 100%. Including - seriously - "oh c'mon, take off your swim trunks and give them to that girl who's asking so she can win the contest."
In that past life, I was told plenty of things about what I "was" and "was not," and I "was not" an athlete (and yet I "was not" ever ladylike enough either). I remember seeing something about this local race down in Santa Cruz and thinking how neat it sounded but I "was not" someone who could do that kind of thing.
And then I started running and I was a runner. I saw that race in Santa Cruz again and thought - too bad I can't swim. And then I started swimming and biking and did my first triathlon. I saw that race again and thought - I can't swim in the ocean, I'll never do a 1/2IM...but if I ever did...that's the one I'd do.
So tomorrow, when I finally toe the line at Big Kahuna after 4 other 1/2IMs and 1 IM, I will remember the journey it's taken to reach this point and know that - PR, no PR, whatever - only I get to define what's a successful race. Just making it to that point, I win - so let's go have some fun tomorrow!